Before I can answer the question, I have some questions of my own. There are some things that I need to know first. The following questions will help me know if feminism is really about equality or is really about something else.
Here goes:
1. Will a feminist ever defend a man from an abusive woman?
A surprising number of men are victims of domestic abuse. But resources for victims of domestic abuse are almost exclusively for women, not men. http://www.saveservices.org/2012/02/cdc-study-more-men-than-women-victims-of-partner-abuse/ When men do seek help, they are often told, “We only help women.”
2. Does adopting feminism mean that I have to accept gender theory as propounded by academic feminists?
Gender feminism denies that any gender differences are inherent or biological. Rather, the differences are seen to be instilled by society. Many studies show that this is not the case.
3. Do feminists see how women are sometimes privileged over men and seek to rectify those inequities?
a. Male suicide.
Men die by suicide 3.53x more often than women. https://afsp.org/about-suicide/suicide-statistics/ Does this show that life may be harder for men in some ways? Can we even ask the question?
b. Male homelessness.
In the UK, 71% of homeless people are men. https://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/thinking-man/11787304/Homelessness-is-a-gendered-issue-and-it-mostly-impacts-men.html
Would a feminist try to make this statistic more equal between men and women? If so, what efforts have feminists engaged in to solve this inequality?
c. Male education
Women are now 33% more likely to get a bachelor's degree than men. https://www.cnsnews.com/news/article/ali-meyer/women-now-33-more-likely-men-earn-college-degrees This means that more government money, through education, is being spent on women. Does this indicate a social preference for women?
d. Female-to-male government benefits.
"Federal assistance is more likely to go to women than men (61% vs. 49%)." https://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2012/12/7-facts-about-government-benefits-and-who-gets-them/266428/
Indeed:
"Social Security is especially important for women, because they tend to earn less than men, take more time out of the paid workforce, live longer, accumulate less savings, and receive smaller pensions. Women represent more than half of Social Security beneficiaries in their 60s and 7 in 10 beneficiaries in their 90s. In addition, women make up 97 percent of Social Security survivor beneficiaries.
Women benefit disproportionately from the program’s inflation-protected benefits (because they tend to live longer than men), its progressive formula for computing benefits (because they tend to have lower earnings), and its benefits for spouses and survivors."
e. The draft.
Men, but not women, have been subject to conscription since the Revolutionary War. Conscription, or "the draft" means that men are forced to join military service if necessary. When I turned 18, I was told that if I did not register for what is called "Selective Service" I would be in danger of losing my right to vote and governmental benefits like Social Security.
f. Male deaths in the work-place.
Men make up a whopping 90% of workplace deaths. Do feminists have a program to help make this more equal? http://articles.latimes.com/1995-08-04/business/fi-31566_1_workplace-deaths
g. Symbols of male foolishness or bondage
Feminists have rightly pointed out how women are stereotyped and pressured to conform with arbitrary standards of beauty. Are there stereotypes that affect men too? Do feminists protest the portrayal of the "doofus dad" like Homer Simpson and Peter Griffin, or the "Beast" from Beauty and the Beast, or the use of neckties, a symbolic noose around the neck of domesticated men?
h. Women and children first.
Do feminists work to change culture to counter the idea that men are disposable? Throughout history, in emergency situations, it was "women and children first." Women and children had innate worth, but men were relatively disposable. Does a feminist address this problem?
4. Do feminists recognize and celebrate men's contributions to society in general and to women in particular?
5. Do feminists treat people as individuals or as mere members of their class, sex, status, race, orientation or political affiliation?
6. If feminism changes society so much that it tilts benefits and privileges too far towards women, will feminism self-correct to make things equal?
7. Do feminists put pressure on women to enter certain fields, like business or engineering, so that women will be more represented? If so, is that a kind thing to do to those women?
8. Do feminists want to exact revenge for past injustices by punishing men, any men, for the injustices of the past to women?
9. Do feminists have an accurate and precise understanding of how much injustice, privilege and prejudice exists and how much women are harmed? If not, how will they know when we've achieved equality?
10. Do feminists have a rigorous definition of "equality?"
11. Can a feminist empathize with a man?
12. Can a feminist express gratitude to a man or to men in general?
If I can get these questions answered, then I may be able to answer the question "am I a feminist."
